Friday, December 08, 2006


It's been almost five months now since my mom passed away and I have yet to share her obituary here. Not quite sure why the oversight, probably nothing special, but I thought I'd share it now. While it's tough to really sum up someone's life I think this does a pretty decent job of conveying the person that mom was. She was a strong woman who excelled at surviving, and it was something from way out in left field that got her in the end. Glioblastoma. What an odd smallish sounding word for this killer tumor. A brain tumor. Who knew that something so far off from all that she had wrong with her would end her life. She was a fantastic person and I'm crushed that I didn't have more time with her nor do my DH or the kids, but there's also a peace that I feel in her death. I guess it's those years of "training" that she has given me in dealing with death and dying, in realizing that life not only has a beginning but an end, and that we do not get to choose when that end comes about. It's also that understanding that life is not about what we are missing out on, but who we are and what we choose to make of the life we have.

So, here's the obituary to read. Enjoy the fact that you knew her if you did, but don't mourn her loss, for she is dancing wherever she is now.

Joan A. Meltz Born in Newark, New Jersey on Sep. 21, 1946 Died Jul. 26, 2006 and resided in San Antonio, TX.
Joan DeVaney Meltz, a 35-year resident of San Antonio, died peacefully in her home on July 26, 2006. She was 59 years old. Joan was a wonderful wife, mother, grandmother, sister, and friend.

Joan was born in Newark, New Jersey on September 21, 1946. She married Martin L. Meltz in Golden Gate Park, San Francisco, on August 7, 1970. She earned a B.A. degree from Our Lady of the Lake University in Speech and Hearing Disorders in May, 1974, and earned a M.A. degree in Counseling Psychology from Trinity University in December, 1978. She worked as a psychotherapist and counselor, both part-time at the Ecumenical Center for Religion and Health, and in private practice.

She was preceded in death by her parents, John DeVaney and Grace McLaughlin DeVaney. Joan is survived by her husband of thirty-five years, Marty; daughter, Suzie and her husband Tom, precious grandsons Max, Ian and Sam; sister and brother-in-law, Ann DeVaney and David Sonneborn; niece, Kristin Becker and her husband, Michael Henninger and their child Oscar Beckinger; nephew, Erik Becker and his wife, Michelle Nord; sister, Suzanne DeVaney; brother and sister-in-law, Hugh and wife, Norma Solena DeVaney and their children, Melissa DeVaney, Ana Sofia DeVaney and Alan DeVaney; sister-in-law and brother-in-law, Gail Rubman, Lewis Rubman and their son, Aaron Rubman.

To know Joan was to know a caring, loving, and accepting woman. Everyone who met her genuinely adored her. Joan was a strong woman who demonstrated her strength through her struggle with her chronic illness, always managing to remain upbeat and joyful while showing a true zest for life. Joan was rarely without opinion on political issues, and actively supported causes related to women’s issues, separation of church and state, and quality education. She was a staunch supporter of peace, and was intolerant of violence. Her beautiful soul will live on forever in everyone who knew her.

Joan’s ashes will be distributed in the Pacific Ocean near the Golden Gate Bridge. A celebration of her life will be held for family and close friends in Sausalito, California, and another in San Antonio in September for her many friends and family here.

You can see it here and leave a note if you like: Mom's Obituary


Lynette Gomez said...

I remember your mom and I will remember her again the next time I go across the Golden Gate Bridge. I am sorry for your loss and I am happy to have known her.


Suzie said...

She will smile as you drive past, I'm sure!